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01/07/20 - Young person of colour adopted and unhappy

01/07/20 - Female, 19 :

Hey i'm adopted and i don't want to be a want my really family i'm always around white people talking about there history but i don't know anything about my history i don't want this family i wan't a real family who i like and want i want a family my color not acting like i'm like them i'm not i want my own story's †my own color i want to grow up with my real mom and my real dad and my real siblings not just pictures i want the real thing

Ali says -


Hello there and thank you for making contact with me

Iím sorry to hear how unhappy you are with your situation and I think itís really important that you find someone you can discuss your feelings with and someone who will help you to explore your birth culture and heritage.If it is possible to talk openly and honestly with your adoptive parents then you should tell them how you are feeling and give them the chance to make positive change.If you canít or if you want to go further I do think it would be valuable for you to talk to Cambridgeshire Adoption Support team.I hope that they will be able to provide you with advice and guidance on how you might get the answers to the questions you seek and support with your current situation. They will also be able to help you explore your personal history.You can contact them via this link:

https://www.cambridgeshire.gov.uk/residents/children-and-families/fostering-and-adoption/adoption/intermediary-services-for-adopted-adults-and-their-birth-relatives

I also appreciate that you might want to talk to someone not related to your adoption situation. Someone who can listen to you and offer emotional support as well as support you to find culturally relevant and safe opportunities with Cambridgeshire groups and with people of colour with whom you identify.Centre 33 have an amazing ďSomeone to talk toĒ service which you can access through their website here http://centre33.org.uk/help/cambridge-south-cambridgeshire/

You are writing your own story and one day you may well have your own family.Personal identity, our values, beliefs and culture are important to us as humans.It is right and natural for you to want to understand yours and to feel that they are valued by others.Be true to yourself and good luck with your story, I hope this helps.

Best wishes

Ali

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